Tristan Croll
13th October 2000, 07:21 PM
Things I Learned from Children
(no, not me personally, I'm only 20 - a little squidger myself)
If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough
to rotate a 42-pound boy wearing pound puppy underwear and a superman
cape.
It is strong enough, however, to spread paint on all four walls of a 20 by
20-foot room.
When you hear the toilet flush and the words "Uh-oh," it's already too
late.
Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.
A six-year-old can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 36 year
old man says they can only do it in the movies.
If you use a waterbed as home plate while wearing baseball shoes it does
not leak--it explodes.
A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. foot house 4
inches deep.
Legos will pass through the digestive tract of a four-year-old.
Super glue is forever.
McGyver can teach us many things we don't want to know.
No matter how much Jello you put in a swimming pool you still can't walk
on water.
Pool filters do not like Jello.
VCR's do not eject PB&J (peanut butter and jelly, for those who need more sleep) sandwiches even though TV commercials show they do.
Always look in the oven before you turn it on.
The fire department in San Jose has at least a 5-minute response time.
The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms dizzy. http://ubb.ubeaut.com.au/ubb/biggrin.gif
It will, however, make cats dizzy.
Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy. http://ubb.ubeaut.com.au/ubb/eek.gif
------------------
Cogito cogito, cogito ergo sum
- I think that I think, therefore I think that I am
[This message has been edited by Tristan Croll (edited 13 October 2000).]
(no, not me personally, I'm only 20 - a little squidger myself)
If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough
to rotate a 42-pound boy wearing pound puppy underwear and a superman
cape.
It is strong enough, however, to spread paint on all four walls of a 20 by
20-foot room.
When you hear the toilet flush and the words "Uh-oh," it's already too
late.
Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.
A six-year-old can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 36 year
old man says they can only do it in the movies.
If you use a waterbed as home plate while wearing baseball shoes it does
not leak--it explodes.
A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. foot house 4
inches deep.
Legos will pass through the digestive tract of a four-year-old.
Super glue is forever.
McGyver can teach us many things we don't want to know.
No matter how much Jello you put in a swimming pool you still can't walk
on water.
Pool filters do not like Jello.
VCR's do not eject PB&J (peanut butter and jelly, for those who need more sleep) sandwiches even though TV commercials show they do.
Always look in the oven before you turn it on.
The fire department in San Jose has at least a 5-minute response time.
The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms dizzy. http://ubb.ubeaut.com.au/ubb/biggrin.gif
It will, however, make cats dizzy.
Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy. http://ubb.ubeaut.com.au/ubb/eek.gif
------------------
Cogito cogito, cogito ergo sum
- I think that I think, therefore I think that I am
[This message has been edited by Tristan Croll (edited 13 October 2000).]