View Full Version : QUOTEABLE QUOTES & MORE a bit of fun
Neil
5th November 2024, 10:53 PM
Something easy and a bit of fun.
Read the quote(s)... enjoy, laugh, be shocked, saddened, uplifted, etc.
Then post an new one.
Can be of your own making, famous quote, from a T-Shirt or sign, who cares.
Can be funny, inspirational, uplifting, sad, grose, whatever you want.
Just keep it clean
_________________
I'll go first. Feel free to follow up with more.
FROM MY FAVORITE T-SHIRT
<tbody>
EAT WELL
STAY FIT
DIE ANYWAY
</tbody>
:o
Neil
5th November 2024, 11:02 PM
FROM MY 2ND FAVORITE T-SHIRT
<tbody>
I AM NOT
IGNORING YOU
I'M JUST NOT
LISTENING
</tbody>
Neil
5th November 2024, 11:14 PM
FROM A T-SHIRT NOW GONE TO GOD
<tbody>
I NEVER DREAMED
THAT ONE DAY
I'D BECOME A
GRUMPY
OLD MAN
BUT HERE I AM
KILLING IT!
</tbody>
Neil
5th November 2024, 11:25 PM
Feel free to follow up with your own.
FROM ANOTHER T-SHIRT (not mine but clever)
<tbody>
THE DEVIL
SAW ME
WITH MY
HEAD DOWN
AND
THOUGHT
HE'D WON
UNTIL I SAID
AMEN
</tbody>
Neil
6th November 2024, 09:55 AM
Growing old is mandatory... Growing up isn't.
ubeaut
6th November 2024, 10:02 AM
Help! I'm a 21 year old trapped in a 75 year old body. :C
Neil
6th November 2024, 10:00 PM
C'mon folks don't be scared, have a go! :scareboo:
Neil
6th November 2024, 10:16 PM
Clever reply to "Go to Hell"
I can't go to Hell.
The devil still has a
restraining order against me.
:firedevil:
Neil
7th November 2024, 08:20 AM
Bit of blatant advertising... Sorry, just couldn't help myself.
From About Us (https://shop.ubeaut.com.au/about-us/) page on our U-Beaut Polishes shop (https://shop.ubeaut.com.au/)
https://shop.ubeaut.com.au/wp-content/uploads/2020/06/HOMEGREEN.jpg
r3nov8or
7th November 2024, 05:44 PM
Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?
r3nov8or
7th November 2024, 05:46 PM
I always give 100% at Work: 10% Monday, 23% Tuesday, 40% Wednesday, 22% Thursday, and 5% Friday.
johnc
7th November 2024, 08:28 PM
Don't take life to seriously
Nobody gets out of it alive anyway
Neil
8th November 2024, 10:23 AM
I owe, I owe, it's off to work I go
I keep on singing all day long
I owe, I owe, I owe, I owe....
r3nov8or
8th November 2024, 07:59 PM
Using all these bullets at once :)
The Quotes of Steven Wright:
1 - I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.
2 - Borrow money from pessimists -- they don't expect it back.
3 - Half the people you know are below average.
4 - 99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
5 - 82.7% of all statistics are made up on the spot.
6 - A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.
7 - A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
8 - If you want the rainbow, you got to put up with the rain.
9 - All those who believe in psycho kinesis, raise my hand.
10 - The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
11 - I almost had a psychic girlfriend, ..... But she left me before we met.
12 - OK, so what's the speed of dark?
13 - How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink?
14 - If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
15 - Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
16 - When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
17 - Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.
18 - Hard work pays off in the future; laziness pays off now.
19 - I intend to live forever ... So far, so good.
20 - If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
21 - Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
22 - What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
23 - My mechanic told me, "I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder."
24 - Why do psychics have to ask you for your name
25 - If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
26 - A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
27 - Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
28 - The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the bread.
29 - To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.
30 - The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.
31 - The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up.
32 - The colder the x-ray table, the more of your body is required to be on it.
33 - Everyone has a photographic memory; some just don't have film.
34 - If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
35 - If your car could travel at the speed of light, would your headlights work?
mic-d
8th November 2024, 08:31 PM
Life is pain princess, anyone who tells you otherwise is selling something. Princess Bride
Everything ends badly, that's why it ends. Name that movie
Murphy was an optimist
Neil
8th November 2024, 11:32 PM
Tree more from Princess bride. A movie everyone should see at least once before they die.
________________________
As you wish
He's been mostly dead all day.
Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.
Neil
8th November 2024, 11:51 PM
This is Bob.
Bob has no arms.
537788
"Knock knock"
"Who's there"
......Not Bob
mic-d
9th November 2024, 08:19 AM
Your biggest supporter is a total stranger, your worst enemy is someone you know.
There is not plenty of time in life, only enough time, and almost no time at all.
We all have a ticket to the terminal, it’s just that some have the arrival time stamped on it.
Neil
9th November 2024, 04:06 PM
A good friend will bail you out of Gaol
Your best friend will be in there with you saying...
"Man, what a rush!!!"
Neil
14th November 2024, 10:06 AM
A couple or so from Winston Churchill
I may be drunk, Madam, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly.
Lady Nancy Astor: "Winston, if you were my husband, I'd poison your tea." Churchill: "Nancy, if I were your husband, I'd drink it."
"The British Constitution is mainly British common sense."
There's shipload more from him. Some funny, some thought provoking, some downright insulting, all worth a look.
ubeaut
14th November 2024, 10:10 AM
I'd give my right arm to be ambidextrous
ubeaut
14th November 2024, 10:22 AM
From me, full of drugs, pain killers, bandages 'n' agony, to Pauline (wife), the morning after inadvertently setting fire to my legs hand and hair at work some 20+ years ago.
"Geez... I got really fired up yesterday, didn't I."
Pauline (the real boss): "You're fired!"
ubeaut
14th November 2024, 11:22 AM
Both on our fridge:
Lifes short. Eat desert first.
For those who read music.
Life without music wouldB537814
For those who
don't read music
537816= Flat
r3nov8or
14th November 2024, 08:51 PM
'There is only one thing in life worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about.’ – Oscar Wilde
mic-d
14th November 2024, 09:43 PM
When I was 17, my father was so stupid, I didn't want to be seen with him in public. When I was 24, I was amazed at how much the old man had learned in just 7 years.
Mark Twain
Neil
17th November 2024, 11:38 PM
When I was 17 I was the stupid one... joined the army in the middle of a war.
My father, on the other hand, was a mathematical genius he could add up and 10 columns and 30 lines of numbers in his head faster than you could do the first column on a calculator. and he was never wrong.
However being a genius doesn't necessarily make you wise.
nemo mortalium omnibus horis sapit
Motto: Royal Antediluvian Order of Buffalos