Radio

[KBs PensNmore]

SWMBO went to switch on the radio in the kitchen,
couldn't work out why it switched off virtually immediately.
Someone sitting along side her with the remote switched it off.
Switched it on again and immediately it was off again,
complained that the radio was faulty.
Took her a few minutes to workout what was going on.
My punishment was to go and get Pizza for tea.

My first wife asked for silence while she cooked tea.
She was good at making UFO's, (Unidentified Fried Objects)
So I took the battery out of the smoke detector.

[Chief Tiff]

My ex-wife was not what you would call competent around a kitchen; the smoke alarm was her main method of establishing that cooking was nearing completion… To this day I believe she is still the only person who ever let toast boil over.

[Old Croc]

To this day I believe she is still the only person who ever let toast boil over.
And my ex was the only person I have seen that could burn the water as well.
Rgds,
Crocy.

[AlexS]

When we first married, my wife asked how long she should boil eggs before they were tender.

[BMKal]

My wife has proven on many occasions that "non-stick" cookware is nothing more than a catchy sales gimmick.

527432

[Crunchie]

I don't know why you guys are complaining. SWMBO was a Home Economics teacher and she got sick of food ordering, teaching students how to cook it (with all the good and bad smells) and fighting with them to clean up properly. Her solution was that I should do all the cooking at home. We're both retired and somehow I've never been able to give her the cooking duties back again. Making a disastrous meal is not the solution. She just says, "That just shows you need more practice".

I'm glad she hasn't insisted I do the washing and ironing as well. At least she doesn't try to take over my lawn mower and she stays out of my shed. (45 years coming up)