Too bad.....

[Breslauer]

Two Women Arriving In Heaven

Two women are new arrivals at the Pearly Gates and are comparing
stories on how they died:

1st woman I froze to death.

2nd woman: How horrible.

1st woman: It wasn't so bad After I quit shaking from the cold, I
began to get warm and sleepy, and finally died a peaceful death. What
about you?

2nd woman: I died of a massive heart attack. I suspected that my
husband was cheating, so I came home early to catch him in the act.
But instead, I found him all by himself in the den watching TV.

1st woman: So what happened?

2nd woman: I was so sure there was another woman there somewhere
that I started running all over the house looking. I ran up into the
attic and searched, and down into the basement. Then I went through every closet and checked under all the beds. I kept this up until I had
looked everywhere, and finally I became so exhausted that I just keeled over with a heart attack and died.

1st woman: Too bad you didn't look in the freezer -- we'd both
still be alive

[Tikki]

ROFLMAO :D :D :D :D

Cheers
Tikki :)

[Iain]

Three men arrive at the pearly gates, the first is asked what happened and he said he suspected his wife was having an affair so he came home early and found a man hanging on the balcony railing.
Outraged he smashed his knuckles and watched him drop into the garden bed two storeys down, what enraged him more was that he was still moving so he picked up a wardrobe and dropped it on him, after this he had a coronary and died.
The second man said he was on the 3rd floor balcony exercising and was doing pull up on the balcony rail when he slipped, dropped one floor and managed to grab the rail there on the way down when he was set upon by a lunatic who smashed his knuckles and made him fall.
He said he landed in the garden and was only winded when this wardrobe landed on him.
The third man announced, well I was hiding in this wardrobe....................