The official explanation of cricket thread

[Daddles]

It's all America's fault.

It is.

Dead set.

After the English gentlemen got their collection bottoms spanked, not to mention getting quite a few good quality serfs killed, by the American Subclass of Colonials (who for some reason no longer wanted to be colonials, but that's by the by), a collection of English Surviving Gentlemen got together to see if they could find a less expensive way of easing these sorts of tensions, especially as they now had to deal with the Australian Subclass of Colonials.

Cricket was the result.

By using this ritualised method of combat, these enlightened gentlemen achieved the following results -
- not as many good quality serfs died
- they (the English) could be flogged silly and it didn't matter
- they could flog the colonials silly and the beggars just came back for another serve, always a good thing provided you could do it again next time
- if they were lucky, they could make a lot of money out of it, though this was a minor consideration as lots of money could also be made in your average shooting type war ... provided you survived.

But they showed the true cunning of the English aristocracy.
They created a set of rules so obscure that the only sure way of telling when someone had failed to grasp a vital concept was to hear him say that he understood it perfectly.

And thus we have cricket today.

Cheers
Richard

[craigb]

No no no, that's not right.

I remember reading the official explanation of cricket on a tea towel some thirtysomething years ago and it was nothing like what you expostulate.

As I remember, it all had to do with the team being "in" getting "out" except for the "not outs" or something equally amusing until it was all over and everybody went to the pub, or something.

[Grunt]

Like this:-

You have two sides, one out in the field and one in. Each man that's in the side that's in goes out and when he's out he comes in and the next man goes in until he's out. When they are all out the side that's out comes in and the side that's been in goes out and tries to get those coming in out. Sometimes you get men still in and not out. When both sides have been in and out including the not outs that's the end of the game!

[Daddles]

Yes, but that's the true genius of cricket. Utter controlled CHAOS. Just like a REAL war. These namby pampy games of football and the like are too easy to understand. But cricket ... 99% sheer boredom with 1% of sheer terror. Just like the real thing.

Richard

[Pat]

Shiite, I grew up with croquet, and I am confused :confused: !!!!

[doug the slug]

And thus we have cricket today.
Actually i prefer teh origins of cricket as described by Douglas Adams in the hitchhikers guide to the galaxy trilogy.

[Zed]

Actually i prefer teh origins of cricket as described by Douglas Adams in the hitchhikers guide to the galaxy trilogy.

I agree with doug the slug, therefore he's right , the rest of you are wrong. All hail Douglas adams.