Some Newfoundland humour

[Breslauer]

We Newfoundlanders are known for our sometimes "tongue-in-cheek" Jokes, being able to make fun at ourselfes. Of course the "Mainland" Canadians don't have our sense of humour and think that our jokes are SIMPLE. Well we tell them the reason our jokes are simple is so that the mainlanders can understand them. Here is a sample:

Two Newfie's went on a camping trip. After a good meal and a bottle of
wine they lay down in their tent for the night and went to sleep. Some
hours later, one of them awoke and nudged his faithful friend awake.

"Bryce, look up at the sky and tell me what you see," said Lloyd. Bryce
replied, "I see millions and millions of stars."
"What does that tell you?" Lloyd questioned. Bryce pondered for a
minute. "Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of
galaxies and potentially billions of planets.
Astrologically, I observe Saturn is in Leo. Logically, I deduce that
the time is approximately a quarter past three. Theologically, I can see
that God is all-powerful and that we are small and insignificant.
Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day
tomorrow".

"Is that all?" Lloyd asked. "Yes," Bryce replied. "Why, am I missing
something?"

Lloyd was quiet for a moment, then spoke softly :

“Bryce you dickhead. Someone has stolen the tent."

[Iain]

We have Queenslanders and Tasmanians :D :D :D :D
Kevlar vest on, yee haaa :p

[bitingmidge]

We have Queenslanders and Tasmanians.......


.... who understand that this sort of thing happens often...


in Victoria!!!


:D :D :D

P

[echnidna]

First bite by a queenslander!!!!

[Zed]

it seems dickhead is an acceptable word. poor he must get so frustrated editing and making the profanofilter longer and longer....

[E. maculata]

Can't see why dickhead would be offensive it's a real enough condition, plenty of the afflicted around :p

[Gingermick]

it seems dickhead is an acceptable word. ..Well it is much less offensive than .. other things. http://www.woodworkforums.ubeaut.com.au/images/icons/icon10.gif

[bsrlee]

You'd better watch out, I first saw this joke as 'two Irishmen'. Someone is stealing stereotypes.

[Driver]

You'd better watch out, I first saw this joke as 'two Irishmen'. Someone is stealing stereotypes.

It's actually a Lone Ranger and Tonto story :D

[craigb]

Can't see why dickhead would be offensive

Neither can I but r*****g is banned now too. :rolleyes:

DAMHIK

[bitingmidge]

Neither can I but r****g is banned now too. :rolleyes:

DAMHIK

Sorry to hear that Craig, was it something you said??

P

:D

[Grunt]

You all are a bunch of wankers. Ooops that ones gone too.

[bitingmidge]

You all are a bunch of wankers. Ooops that ones gone too.Well if r******g's banned .......

P

:D :D

[E. maculata]

Grunts' word got me thinking of the old adage.....


the very first time I had sex....


It was dark.................


I was scared.........
























& I was ALONE



and if r*****gs' banned that's all that's left

[E. maculata]

Ahem, apparently it's not :o

[Caliban]

Ahem, apparently it's not :o
Bruce !
Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. ;)
You never know when there is a politician watching.
They'll pass legislation to tax it. :eek:

[E. maculata]

Jim I reckon they already have a payment method for it, it's called "marriage" and the value added tax is called "children" :p
and If I ever have to pay a tax for them....Hang on I do :D

[graemet]

It's actually a Lone Ranger and Tonto story :D When I first heard it........ it was Sherlock Holmes and Dr.Watson! (But then that was before TV.) http://www.woodworkforums.ubeaut.com.au/images/icons/icon10.gif

[Ashore]

, being able to make fun at ourselfes.No need on this forum we will do it for you
Was that Bryce or a typo Bruce which may explain why they didn't notice the tent being pinched.



Don't take life too seriously; No one gets out alive.