How do you deal with those annoying phone calls from India?

[artme]

A mate of mine has a friend who places an order for curry!:D

My son asks for their number to confirm things and then says he will inform thE Federal Police!

Others simply say #@&^%%*

Unfortunately a mate of mine had a senior moment and fell for the con. Rsult was a costly virus on his computer!!:oo::oo:

[opelblues]

apply for "No Call Register" and at the same time ask for call tracking, the first one doent cost but the second does, it is worth it i have not recived calls for 6 months

[DavidG]

Play as the old computer illiterate fool.
Have massive problems following their instructions. They say type .... you say that did not work.

Play along up to the point where they want you to connect to their web site giving them access to your pc and then burst out laughing and let them know that you know what they are doing all along. A few appropriate expletives may be used here.

Aim is to get 15 to 20 min of giggles and pure frustration for them. :U

[chrisb691]

Once I managed to understand that he was from 'Microsoft', and that 'they' had noticed that my computer had a virus that 'they' wanted to 'fix' for me. I told him he was a lying piece of s$$t, and to $@!& off..........and he did. :D

[NCArcher]

I try to get them to hang up on me. I managed to get one guy to yell at me that I was wasting his time and then slam the phone down. :U I was so pleased with myself.

[Chesand]

1. Place the phone in the nearest drawer and walk away
2. Ask them how their mother, father, children are. if you want to waste your time and theirs

[johnredl]

I try to get them to hang up on me. I managed to get one guy to yell at me that I was wasting his time and then slam the phone down. :U I was so pleased with myself.

Your evil!! Good work tho :)

[FenceFurniture]

and to $@!& off..........and he did. :D


Yes, but did he do it quickly, as in FOQ (not FAQ)? I'll second the no call register, it works a treat. 2 years ago when I was living in Sydney (and working from home) I used to get absolutely hammered with calls from all and sundry, not just India. One mob in Florida were relentless until I played along the game one night, and went through to the next level. "How does that sound?", "Oh yeah that's great, tell me more!". I used to work in Sales, and was taught by the best, so I have a pretty good understanding of things like answering a question with a question etc.

Anyway, through to the next level we went, and all up about 20 minutes before I told the idiot that I was actually just wasting her time because they had wasted so much of mine previously (I didn't have much to do at the time, and really wanted to aggravate them). I think I may have added an FOQ as well. Never heard from them again:D. One thing that used to really sheet me off was getting a call from them, I'd answer, and only to be put on hold! FOQ! NOW!

Cheers, FF

[FenceFurniture]

I also had this recording on the answering machine - got a few laughs it did! One telemarketer actually stayed the distance to leave a congratulatory msg for me - she loved it:

<!--><xml> <w:WordDocument> <w:View>Normal</w:View> <w:Zoom>0</w:Zoom> <w:PunctuationKerning/> <w:ValidateAgainstSchemas/> <w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid> <w:IgnoreMixedContent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent> <w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText> <w:Compatibility> <w:BreakWrappedTables/> <w:SnapToGridInCell/> <w:WrapTextWithPunct/> <w:UseAsianBreakRules/> <w:DontGrowAutofit/> </w:Compatibility> <w:BrowserLevel>MicrosoftInternetExplorer4</w:BrowserLevel> </w:WordDocument> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:LatentStyles DefLockedState="false" LatentStyleCount="156"> </w:LatentStyles> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 10]> <style> /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0cm 5.4pt 0cm 5.4pt; mso-para-margin:0cm; mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:10.0pt; font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-ansi-language:#0400; mso-fareast-language:#0400; mso-bidi-language:#0400;} </style> <![endif]--> [I]LISTEN UP! I am dead set sick of the Bombay Blitz. This phone will not be answered until you have announced who you are and what you want. If you are a telemarketer, Market researcher or anyone even vaguely similar you can bugger off quickly. This applies in particular those who do “not want to sell me anything” or want to use my name 6 times a minute. If you try to sneak through and trick me then I will blow a very loud whistle down the phone which will hopefully give you an ear ache. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED! Anyone else will be patient enough to announce themselves, and if I’m here maybe I’ll pick up.


It was recorded in a very hostile voice, becoming normal again at the end.

[fxst]

As I don't have any indian/asian friends or know people in those countries I just hang up. :2tsup: No frustation and back to eating my meal.:) Wasting 20mins of their time is wasting yours too. I would rather do something construtive. Yes I am on the do not call register and that works most times.
Why bother to jerk their chain when they only get $2 /hr or day whatever.
Pete

[Ashore]

Let them talk a bit then ask them if their wearing any underwear, tell them your not and ask if that excites them ,..............havent had one who didn't hang up

[Ashore]

As I don't have any indian/asian friends or know people in those countries I just hang up. :2tsup: No frustation and back to eating my meal.:) Wasting 20mins of their time is wasting yours too. I would rather do something construtive. Yes I am on the do not call register and that works most times.
Why bother to jerk their chain when they only get $2 /hr or day whatever.
Pete
They may only be getting $2 an hour but what about the poor older peninsioner that gets caught and has their bank account raided
They may only get $2 an hour but they know that the poor bugger they catch will get ripped off and they don't care

[pellcorp]

Let them talk a bit then ask them if their wearing any underwear, tell them your not and ask if that excites them ,..............havent had one who didn't hang up

I have VoIP only and don't get any of these calls - except for folks looking for ANZ bank. Apparently we have a recycled number that used to be an ANZ branch number. But I would love to try out your approach hilarious !

[Wood en I]

]Let them talk a bit then ask them if their wearing any underwear, tell them your not and ask if that excites them ,..............havent had one who didn't hang up[/QUOTE]


Man that is the best one I have ever heard.:clap3::clap3::clap3: I cant wait for one of these maggots to call.

[HOOKED.UP]

This trick from a friend of mine.

Tell the caller you are really interested and ask them to hold for a second.
Put the phone on the bench/table and walk away.
This ties up their phone line I believe, till you hang up.

We hardley get any of these calls any more, so there must be a "hit" list of numbers not to call.

My best effort was being out of the hose for 6 hours. When I came back and picked up the phone, I could still here office noises. I just hung up.

I don't know if this still works as telephone technology is improving all the time.
But it is fun to pester them, as they pester us.

Paul.

[Grumpy John]

I've been on the No Call Register for a couple of years now and I think I've only had one "sales call" in that time :2tsup:.



:offtopic:
I'd love to put this message on my phone.

‪Irish Mental Health Hotline‬‏ - YouTube

[AlexS]

The DNC register seems to work fairly well in eliminating calls from within Australia, but it won't stop those from overseas companies or would-be hackers.
SWMBO, who doesn't have a computer, loves stringing along those who have 'found a virus on your computer'. I prefer a less diplomatic approach.

[FenceFurniture]

Cracker Grumpy! Now I can forgive you for sucking me in to the "Look at the Tits on this" 9 months later. I even got catsigated by Tea Lady!

[FenceFurniture]

I prefer a less diplomatic approach.

And that would be...........?

[AlexS]

!@#$ *&^ !

[tea lady]

Cracker Grumpy! Now I can forgive you for sucking me in to the "Look at the Tits on this" 9 months later. I even got catsigated by Tea Lady!:DI am everywhere!

I am on VoIP to and haven't had a call for ages. :cool: But usually you can tell its a telly marketer cos there is a wait before they say anything as their automatic calling thingy calls multiple numbers at once. I hang up before anyone says anything! :shrug:

[Grumpy John]

The DNC register seems to work fairly well in eliminating calls from within Australia, but it won't stop those from overseas companies or would-be hackers.
SWMBO, who doesn't have a computer, loves stringing along those who have 'found a virus on your computer'. I prefer a less diplomatic approach.

Don't know if I'm lucky or what, but the NCR seems to have stopped ALL nuisance calls, even those from O/S

[Geoff Dean]

Let them talk a bit then ask them if their wearing any underwear, tell them your not and ask if that excites them ,..............havent had one who didn't hang up


1. Yep, currently using that one myself. Generally start going into explicit detail about what I am doing to myself at the time. Works a treat.

2. An umpires whistle is also very effective.

3. Get them to phone back later at a set time, the person they need to speak to will be here then. Have the whistle handy.

4. Pretend to follow their instructions, when they ask "what do you see now?" tell them there is a little window that has opened on the screen with a message on it. "What does it say?", they ask.
Tell them that it says: You have a scammer on your phone who is too stupid to know that they are trying to scam someone with a Mac. That generally gets the fastest hang up of the lot.

Do not call register doesn't seem to work for them, they continue to call regardless.

[jimbur]

Don't get them at home as we're on a silent number.
In the office tell them you're from the receivers and ask them if they owe any money.
Cheers,
Jim

[Shutterbug]

This procedure seems to work well.

‪http://youtu.be/mkdoogjic4I

[FenceFurniture]

!@#$ *&^ !
Exclamation mark at sign hash sign dollar asterisk empersand funny hat exclamation mark.

Wouldn't it be quicker just tell them to Duck Off? Just a thought.

[fxst]

They may only be getting $2 an hour but what about the poor older peninsioner that gets caught and has their bank account raided
They may only get $2 an hour but they know that the poor bugger they catch will get ripped off and they don't care

the magic word in my comment was 'I hang up'. How can the silly old buggers get caught if they just do that??:oo:
simple really :doh:

[Aerenandmel]

https://www.donotcall.gov.au/

I registered a few years ago and i never get calls from these people... :2tsup:

[fubar]

thanks for that link Aerenandmel:2tsup:

[Skew ChiDAMN!!]

"Hang on a second... what did you say your name was again? You wouldn't be related to a Mr [surname] from Abuja in Nigeria by any chance? I'm his executor, handling his estate and you may be eligible for a US$1 million inheritance. If you'll just give me your banking details..."

[issatree]

Hi All,
We get the occasional call, & when I answer, I just keep saying, " HELLO, HELLO, HELLO " while they are trying to talk to me, & you get the drift, & in the end they just hang up.
I have also confused them by telling that those people don't live here anymore, & the Phone goes down.
Great.

[I_wanna_Shed]

We are in the phone book under my wife's maiden name, and we are NEVER changing it. When people say "Is that Mr/Mrs 'maiden name'", we know its a useless call straight away and hang up.

Oh, and for the people who come knocking on your door, whatever they are selling I just say "my work pays for my phone/electricity/gas/whatever". They don't have a comeback at all then.

We had a call at work once - we managed to transfer the call 8 times before they hung up.

Nathan.

[artme]

:D
We are in the phone book under my wife's maiden name, and we are NEVER changing it. When people say "Is that Mr/Mrs 'maiden name'", we know its a useless call straight away and hang up.

Oh, and for the people who come knocking on your door, whatever they are selling I just say "my work pays for my phone/electricity/gas/whatever". They don't have a comeback at all then.

We had a call at work once - we managed to transfer the call 8 times before they hung up.

Nathan.

Another name to go in my book of devious individuals.:D:D:D

[Ron Dunn]

I often get calls from "Microsoft" claiming that I have been detected with an error in my computer network.

Funny thing is, I work for Microsoft.

When I offer to transfer them to our security department they hang up very quickly. Can't understand why?

[tea lady]

We had a call at work once - we managed to transfer the call 8 times before they hung up.

Nathan.Ah! Its the little pleasures in life!.... :rofl:


I often get calls from "Microsoft" claiming that I have been detected with an error in my computer network.

Funny thing is, I work for Microsoft.

When I offer to transfer them to our security department they hang up very quickly. Can't understand why?:U

[Cliff Rogers]

The last time somebody with a bad accent called to tell me that I had a virus on my computer I asked them "Which one, I have 3?" they had a very had time trying NOT to say that it didn't matter. :rolleyes:
They just told me to "get in front of my computer & turn it on."
I just kept with my story that I had to know which one it was that had the virus.
They said that they would know once they had checked them all.
I told them if they were clever enough to know it was my computer that had the virus then they should also be able to tell me which one it was.
They then tried to tell me that my ISP had reported it coming from my IP address.
Somewhere during my explanation of Dynamic IPs they figured out that I knew just a little bit more about computers than they had bargained for. :D

[fenderbelly]

I've been getting the Microsoft calls lately and i'm on the DNC register but the buggers are trying a new tack now.

I got this on my mobile phone the other day

CONGRATS
From Micro Soft
Your Mobile No won
3.5M GBP

Reply us on our Email
[email protected].

(+44)701-112-7450
Dr.Anderson Spencer

[DavidG]

Another one I use is to tell them I run Linux.
That is when I don't have time to reel them in.

[A Duke]

I have 2 lines with numbers 60 apart and it is usual to have the same mob phoning both at the same time, as I have both phones on my desk, I have managed to put the handsets down so that the 2 operators could have a chat. The other common thing is as you hang one the other rings and they are shocked when you point out that you have already told them, then they look at the name they have just asked for and I get a shocked "ah yes."

[Bob38S]

Have tried being polite, gave up trying to be reasonable and have moved through the following -
- the old "Hang on while I get a pencil" and go and have a coffee,
- "Could you speak a little louder - I'm hard of hearing" again and again until they are shouting,
- start speaking in Klingon or similar,
- constantly interrupting with inane questions and asking for clarification of all answers,

All of the above have provided me with some amusement but in many cases it is too easy - I've lost interest so now my stock standard method is 2 questions and then a statement.

1 Are you interested in travel?
2 Are you interested in sex?

Well, Fxxx Off!

I take great delight that the telemarketers are being stressed and getting sick because they have to deal with those terrible Aussies.

If the government and or Telcos were really serious about this problem we would not have a Do Not Call register we would have an Opt In register and it would no longer be a problem however, I'm realistic enough to know this won't happen, unfortunately, because there is too much money to be made.

[RayG]

I hand the phone to my 5 year old granddaughter, who just loves jabbering away on the phone...

Seems to work, and she has a great time... we seem to be getting fewer calls lately...:)

Regards
Ray

[jimbur]

When you are getting really annoyed calm down and think of the service you are providing to the callers from Mumbai or wherever. Their use of the Australian vernacular must have improved by leaps and bounds. Imagine them applying to emigrate and demonstrating their new command of the language in an interview.:D
Cheers,
Jim