Chinese proverbs

[Christopha]

Virginity like bubble. One prick, all gone.
> >
> >Man who run in front of car get tired.
> >
> >Man who run behind car get exhausted.
> >
> >Man with hand in pocket feel cocky all day.
> >
> >Foolish man give wife grand piano. Wise man give wife upright organ.
> >
> >Man who walk through airport turnstile sideways going to Bangkok.
> >
> >Man with one chopstick go hungry.
> >
> >Man who scratch **** should not bite fingernails.
> >
> >Man who eat many prunes get good run for money.
> >
> >Panties not best thing on earth, but next to best thing on earth.
> >
> >War does not determine who is right, war determine who is left.
> >
> >Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night.
> >
> >It take many nails to build crib, but one screw to fill it.
> >
> >Man who drive like hell, bound to get there.
> >
> >Man who stand on toilet is high on pot.
> >
> >Man who live in glass house should change clothes in basement.
> >
> >Man who fish in other man's well often catch crabs.
> >
> >Man who fart in church sit in own pew.
> >
> >Crowded elevator smell different to midget.

[craigb]

So wonderfully non PC :)

I wonder what Wongo thinks of it. :confused:

[bsrlee]

For some REAL Chinese humor, see if you can get a copy of 'So the Saying Goes' published by Uni Qld. press. Remarkably similar taste in humor :-)

[Wongo]

So wonderfully non PC :)

I wonder what Wongo thinks of it. :confused:

Vely wise. Vely wise indee.

[RETIRED]

:D:D:D

[Grunt]

Man under car with tool in hand not necessarily mechanic.

[ozwinner]

Man who make love on the side of hill, not on level


Al

[AlexS]

Lady who fly plane upside down bound to have crack-up.

[Iain]

Doug Byler and Ruey Min Tseng
What do the Chinese curse and swear? I think cursing and swearing all over the world, though developed from different cultures, have a universal approach. That is, insult the people or the things that your opponents care most. I collected the Chinese curses and found there are three categories that the Chinese care most, they are: ancestors, family and death. The Chinese worship and respect their ancestors. If you insult a Chinese, sometimes he will let it go. However, if you place a curse on his ancestors, he will consider it as an extreme humiliation. Instead of four- letter word in English, the Chinese uses so called three-character word to insult their opponents' ancestors and parents.

The Chinese value continuing the family line by having a male heir very much. If people curse you "Die without a son, die without a grandson," it means they swear your family tree will be cut off. To the Chinese, it will be the most regrettable thing in their lives.

Because many Chinese believe in reincarnation, they not only want to die in good shape, they also want their bodies to be buried in a nice place. So that when they are reborn, they are decent people again. Curses like "Die without being buried", "Hit by thunderbolt" and "Stabbed thousand times" are used by people to express their severe reprimand to others.

And who was the laundry man in the book, the odd angry shot 'F*K YU' as I recall.
BUgger that was Vietnam not China, oh well, the red isa starting tyo kick ibn......

[Wongo]

Very good Ian. You are right we respect our ancestors and family is still number 1 in our lives.

Personally I do not believe in reincarnation. I am quite happy to die without a son. Plus I have a feeling that I will end up having 2 or 3 girls anyway but I am not blooding paying for their weddings though. Oh well maybe I am not that Chinese anymore. I mean my wife is Aussie, my daughter has blue eyes, I can hardly write in Chinese now and I am not very wise. :(

No that’s not true I am still a fair dinkum Chinese, I still am, I am. Ahhhhhhhh………

[Iain]

Aah, wise Wongo, I have two daughters and dread the wedding day (a fair way off yet I hope), I also worked for several years with a Chinese Accountant.
He was not a bad bloke but his family was destined for disaster, his Father who could not speak English, bought a pizza shop off a Greek who also could not speak English.
Part of the deal was the Greek was going to help the Chinese make pizza's until he got the hang of it.
Yhe business went broke very quickly.
As for Mickey (that was his name), he worked in my department on a fraud case for two years and we all called him grasshopper, it was almost two years before he worked out why :D
Unfortunately Mickey lost the plot and went to work for the ATO, I still see him and he still turns bright red when he has a beer.

[Wongo]

Ian,

It is a little bit off the topic (whats the topic anyway).
In China it is the family of the groom who are paying for the wedding. In fact you have the right to ask for gifts, jewellery and money for giving away your daughter. However, most people don’t practise such great tradition these days except the wealthy ones of course. They have too much money to spare and they don’t want to lose face. :mad:

I still think it is a great tradition and I am sticking with it. Of course it would change if I had a son. :cool: