View Full Version : Honest John
RETIRED
26th August 2004, 06:45 PM
From a friend:
A public servant, on his way home from work in Canberra traffic came to a dead halt and thought to himself, "This is unusual."
He noticed a police officer walking between the lines of stopped cars, so he rolled down his window and asked, "Officer, what's the hold-up?"
The officer replied, "The Prime Minister is depressed, so he stopped his
motorcade and is threatening to douse himself with petrol and set himself on fire. He says no one believes his stories about why we went to war in Iraq, or the connection between Saddam and al-Qaeda, or that his tax cuts will help anyone except his wealthy friends. So we're taking up a collection for him."
The public servant asks, "How much have you got so far?"
The officer replies, "About 200 litres, but a lot of people are still siphoning..."
Wood Borer
26th August 2004, 07:29 PM
I am disappointed with you , when I first starting reading it I thought it was true but then I realised it was only a joke - talk about a let down. :D
ozwinner
26th August 2004, 07:32 PM
Well, wont be long now, and we can all douse him in petrol, so to speak.
Ive got the matches.
Al :D
Wood Borer
26th August 2004, 07:44 PM
Maybe that's why the price of petrol has risen lately.
Toggy
26th August 2004, 08:16 PM
I've got a spare 10 litres I can donate to the cause.
Ken
soundman
27th August 2004, 12:38 AM
I'v always reconed that politicians are like nappies.
They might start clean but its not very long before they are full of S%#t so they should be changed regularly.
also
stopp the superanuation rort don't re-elect a sitting member!
Ben from Vic.
27th August 2004, 12:48 AM
See, thats what I like about this BB.
We arn't biased, we have a shot at all political figures equally. :D
And (yes, I stared my sentance with "And") no one gets offended and starts a debate.
And the Dry witty banter. :D :D
Ben.
Wood Borer
27th August 2004, 09:32 AM
[QUOTEwe have a shot at all political figures equally. :D [/QUOTE]
We weren't shooting them, we were letting them burn themselves :D which is a form of conditioning for them because in their afterlife most of them will be near flames - no lies.
TassieKiwi
27th August 2004, 11:26 AM
LOL:D . How about some napalm to make a nice even burn?
Barry_White
27th August 2004, 01:01 PM
Maybe that's why the price of petrol has risen lately.
Here is an Interesting article I recieved in an e-mail.
August 25, 2004
An Early to Rise Investment Advisory <HR noShade>
THIS IS AN URGENT WARNING:
'On July 2, 2006, a SEISMIC energy 'event'
will END the age of cheap oil forever...
ERASING over 150 years of American prosperity...
And OBLITERATING the wealth of millions of investors...
...PRACTICALLY OVERNIGHT!'
Think $40 Oil and $2 Gallons of Gas Are Bad?
Get Ready For Prices FOUR TIMES That High!
'E-DAY!'
THE DAY THE WORLD RUNS OUT OF GAS
Do nothing, lose everything. Or you can
make as much as 668% on the two stocks that are set to SOAR as the chaos unfolds...
Dear Chronic Oil Junkie,
'E-Day,' the MOST DEVASTATING FINANCIAL EVENT in 150 years, will arrive July 2, 2006. That's my best estimate.
And no, you won't hear any bells go off.
They won't even talk about it on the nightly news... until it's too late!
We'll start the finger-pointing with the politicians who IGNORED this savage threat because they knew it would DERAIL the elections!
<TABLE style=" 18 138px" cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=3 width=181 align=right bgColor=#eeeecc border=1><TBODY><TR><TD height=62>
'[With Tocqueville Gold] I posted 140% gain - great pick!... 'Only' 64% [with Northgate] - another winner... Great job!'
- Charles B., Outstanding Investments Member
</TD></TR></TBODY></TABLE>
Next we'll blame the media that shunned piles of MIND-BLOWING evidence available years ago because it simply wasn't sexy enough for the headlines!
We'll blame OPEC, which deliberately hid the TRUTH about this crisis for over a decade... just so they could hike up their own export quotas and rake in more oil profits!
And we'll blame 'Big Oil,' which not only BURIED this evidence back in the 1950s, but as recently as THIS YEAR used even more false data to boost its own share prices!
But even when the finger-pointing is done, we'll still have the earth-rattling crisis I'm about to reveal. What crisis?
$8 to $12 for a gallon of gas... huge fuel lines... even 'gas riots' like we saw outside London in the year 2000...
Airports empty because it's too expensive to fly... supermarkets empty because it's too expensive to ship goods!
Think it can't happen? Think again!
America - along with the rest of the world - is about to run out of cheap gas! When it happens, your wealth... your health... and your whole way of life will come under jeopardy!
In fact, it has already begun. The mob is ALREADY the past waking up to what could become the most vicious and unpredictable financial time in the past 150 years of world history!
A new Cold War on the shores of the Caspian... new terrorism and oil killings in Saudi Arabia... military conflict over offshore oil under the South China Sea...
We All KNEW This Crisis Was
Coming, but Not Nearly This Soon!
Let's not kid ourselves. EVERYBODY knew 'E-Day' would come one day. You can't burn through a resource that doesn't replace itself... and not expect to run out eventually!
What hundreds of thousands of people... perhaps millions of people... never realized was that it would happen this SOON!
Even according to plenty of so-called 'experts'... we weren't supposed to run out of energy for another 25 - 30 years! But that's not the way it's happening!
The mad scramble has already begun. The whispers have started. The world is already off balance. And now, the wide-eyed optimists are in for the SHOCK OF THEIR LIVES!
This devastating event... which nobody expected for decades... is lurking right around the corner. The actual day, according to my best calculations, would be on or around July 2, 2006.
But you have even less time than that to get ready.
Because the panic begins even sooner... as the mob and the markets wake up to the historic reversal ahead!
This is no small event!
Already, we're seeing the symptoms of a collapse. Think about it. Soaring oil prices. Tension between petroleum-starved economies. Deadly terrorism in Saudi Arabia.
This time, it's not really about ideology... it's about geology. Deep underground, the world's source of cheap oil is on the brink of running out. And nothing you do to make or protect your money can or will ever be the same again.
I can promise you, these will not be easy times ahead.
But I can promise you something else, too.
I'm confident, in the wake of this crisis, that even as most investors lose fortunes and many world markets spiral into chaos... a few smart energy investors will still get very rich! But not in the way you might imagine, buying major energy stocks. How then?
In the pages that follow, I'd like to show you two simple 'safeguard' investments you should make right NOW to get ready for huge leveraged gains when the rest of the mob wakes up to this impending event.
Read On... (http://www.agora-inc.com/reports/OST/day844/)
silentC
27th August 2004, 01:28 PM
Let me guess: if you invest in MY stock portfolio TODAY, you will be financially protected from this terrible event?
Barry_White
27th August 2004, 02:20 PM
Silent
You can please yourself, but I'm certainly NOT.
Caliban
27th August 2004, 02:29 PM
Silent
You can please yourself, but I'm certainly NOT.
Not what? ;)
RETIRED
27th August 2004, 02:40 PM
The only catastrophe that will happen that day as far as I am concerned is that I turn 56. :D
Barry_White
27th August 2004, 02:48 PM
Not what? ;)
Hovo
Read silentC's post
DavidG
27th August 2004, 03:29 PM
Oh dear! another get rich rip off scheme.
File it with the rest.
WPB.
AlexS
27th August 2004, 11:26 PM
The only catastrophe that will happen that day as far as I am concerned is that I turn 56. :D
Ah, , growing old may not be much fun, but it sure beats the alternative!
Caliban
28th August 2004, 10:37 PM
Hovo
Read silentC's post
Bazza
I did I was trying to be smart ars3 in a subtle way.Did you not notice the wink smilie?Like this ;)
Sorry for any inconvenience :D
Barry_White
29th August 2004, 10:49 AM
Hovo
Thats ok, I'm a little slow on picking up on subtleties.
vsquizz
29th August 2004, 12:07 PM
Hovo
Thats ok, I'm a little slow on picking up on subtleties.
Better off to be like me Bazza and just be a bit slow in general. That way most of this stuff just zooms right on overhead:D